Tagged: Arthur Adams

Cover Bland

This past weekend I picked up a back issue for a strange little 70’s monster comic called Creatures on the Loose #13 from Marvel. WHY? Because it featured a shaggy white monstrosity in a gold skirt walking out of a rainbow colored television while scaring the beejeezus out of some square. This monster then loudly proclaims “I-HAVE-COME-TO-TAKE-YOU-TO-KROGARR!!”

Now THAT is a cover you just can’t argue with!

JUDGING BY COVER

So how was this inspiring trip to Krogarr? It was alright, if you like wacky monsters. Personally I can’t get enough of em’, that’s why one of the books to watch this week is DC’s Frankenstein: Agent of SHADE #5. Franky-baby is going to smack around O.M.A.C.: the One Machine Attack Construct who looks more like a One Monster Augly Contest. That was “Ugly” with a silent “A.” They’ll make slappy in the facey until one of them explodes or cries or goes home with a sniffle! YAY!

I took the chance on Creatures on the Loose because of the cover. While you can’t judge a book by its cover for legal reasons, you certainly get first impressions. This can be both good and bad. Continue reading

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Machine. Unexpectedly, I’d invented a Time

In 1995 director Lars Von Trier, tired of the special effects and genre tropes he felt were ruining cinema, created a list of rules for filmmakers to follow in order to make superior, modern artistic worth. This new style for film-making was called “Dogma 95.”

Rules like “Filming must be done on location,” “No overdubbed background music,” and “All films must feature at least one bear-mauling” make perfect sense when you think about them.

Why do I mention this? Well, I’ve just read Avengers X-Sanction #1. It is, don’t get me wrong, a beautiful book. I’ve liked the team of Loeb and McGuiness since Batman/Superman and I loved them on The Hulk (by the way, trades of these great runs are available here at the Planet!). Loeb keeps his stories simple, fluid, and action packed. McGuiness is the inheritor of Arthur Adams.

BUT. The plot of X-Santion is…iffy. Cable, the time hopping mutant son of Cyclops and Jean Grey’s clone, is going to capture/kill all of the Avengers because somehow they will kill Hope, his time-traveling mutant adopted daughter who is probably a clone of Jean Grey.

And WHY does he think this? I’m sure it will be clarified in future issues, but if we only read this first issue (and again, it is the only one out yet) it is because A) he wakes up in the future after being dead with no explanation of how he got there, B) THIS future (and this is a character that has experienced many) is desolate and destroyed, and C) a time traveling friend of his named Blaquesmith told him that the future was destroyed because “Hope is dead and it’s the Avengers fault.”

GETTING BACK

So about the Dogma Film movement and the new rules for making superior art? I have a rule for comics: NO MORE messed up time travel stories!

Especially in this instance! Blaquesmith could have been speaking metaphorically. “Whoa!” He could say, later on. “You tied Captain America to a chair and shot him in the head because I said Hope was dead? I meant, like, HOPE, ya know? The desire to aspire towards loftier goals and ambitions? You thought I meant your adopted daughter? Way to fly off the handle there, Cable.”

Besides, these future moments take place in “The Far Future.” I should hope that Hope is dead in “The Far Future,” because otherwise she’d be, like, 500-50 thousand years old. As premises go this is like going back in time to kill Mickey Mantle because he didn’t play in the 2011 World Series.

NOT ONLY THAT but Hope is only alive at all because Cable recently fought against a time traveling Bishop who went back to the past to kill her because a potential future he envisioned was destroyed because of her. Continue reading

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